


It's you and me, baby

by KhaSterek



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: (Ish) - Freeform, (ish) he can still love and feel some things, Afraid of the dark event, Alternate Universe - Dark, Angst, Blood Drinking, Blood Play, Bottom Derek Hale, Canon Compliant, Consent Issues, Crying, Dark Spark Stiles (Yes I totally invented it, Darker than I intended to also, Derek is no okay with the pain, Derek only wants to be loved by Stiles, Dom Stiles Stilinski, Emotional Manipulation, Happy Ending, Happy ending? lol As happy as a dark fic can get I guess, He still enjoys it at the end? And there's some fluff? And some aftercare?, I think? Idk what angst is when I'm writing, I'm sorry?, Knife Play, M/M, Mentioned Allison Argent/Lydia Martin/Scott McCall, POV Derek, POV Scott, POV Stiles Stilinski, Pain, Post-Season/Series 04, Sadistic Stiles Stilinski, Smut, Sociopath Stiles Stilinski, Stiles Stilinski Has Issues, Stiles is a bad dom, Subdrop, The Pack Doesn't Know, This fic is all kinds of fucked up, Top Stiles Stilinski, Unhealthy Relationships, Unnegotiated Kink, but it's not explicit, but like a little in the future, i think, just go with it), maybe it's just me since I don't enjoy the word, mention of a dead squirrel, more explicit than I intended to, non-masochist Derek, overuse of the word baby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2020-12-07 22:30:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20983448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KhaSterek/pseuds/KhaSterek
Summary: His best friend smiled at him, unbothered. "Yes, we have sex. Frequently.""For more than a year!" Scott suddenly said exasperatedly, then frowned, rage spiking up. "Derek doesn't want it to be official, does he? That's why he cut me off just now. I'm gonna kill him."Stiles kept smiling. Well, smirking was a better word for it, as of now actually. "No, Scotty. Derek wants anything I want. And before you say anything else, I don't go talking about your creepy threesome with Allison and Lydia, so leave my relationship with Derek alone, 'kay?" his best friend finished with a pat on his shoulder.**DARK AU - Canon-ish (But NOT REALLY… lol I mean, generally I guess… The plot points. Scott being bitten and then becoming a true alpha, Derek killing Peter and becoming an alpha. Then Derek turning Erica, Boyd, and Isaac. no nogitsune)**





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This a DARK AU people. Don't forget. READ THE TAGS!!!!!!!!
> 
> YES, Stiles is sick, sociopathy is a MENTAL DISORDER! :D 
> 
> I also feel the need to point out that, there is no cure/treatment/therapy for sociopathy.  
So even tho I did tag "happy ending" Stiles won't be suddenly cured. Just FYI.
> 
> Thank you [sisforsterek](/users/sisforsterek/) for helping with the proofreading, and overall cheerleading s2s2  
To [emebalia](/users/emebalia/) for giving me advices on the plot  
and Chocobo that let me borrow her idea which I ended up not using, but helped me think about something that worked.  
  
English is not my first language.  
Don't like it Don't read! 
> 
> **Like Thumper once said. “If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all.” **
> 
> If anything isn't accurate with real-life call it artistic license.

Every werewolf in the pack knew that Stiles and Derek were a thing. Nobody talked about it, but they knew. They could smell their scent mingled together as one. It wasn't a new thing. Scott thought it happened first when Derek died, but Isaac always said it was long before that. Scott still refused to believe it, because Isaac said Stiles was the reason the blonde wolf was thrown out of the loft. Because _Stiles _told Derek to do it. That was the craziest thing Isaac could ever say. Scott didn't listen to him. He just told Isaac to stop being so jealous of his best friend.

So what if Derek didn't give as much attention to his beta as he gave Stiles. _ Get over it, Isaac_. Scott told him a couple of times when Isaac tried to explain that _ Stiles _ (of all people) was bad for _Derek_. That _Stiles _constantly hurt Derek, not only physically but mentally as well. 

"I could _ hear _ them, Scott!" Isaac said once, and it made Scott's blood boil. He had Isaac pinned to the wall, snarling in his face in no time.

"How far does your jealousy of your alpha's attention go, Isaac?" Scott barked in his face. "Do _ not _talk about Stiles like that ever again."

Isaac didn't flinch though; his brow only furled in rage as his eyes flashed gold, and he said nothing but nodded at the True Alpha.

Scott remembered thinking that Derek was an alpha werewolf; he could take care of himself. Besides, Stiles was the best person Scott had ever met. Isaac was just jealous, for sure. But something deep inside was nagging at him, and it kept doing it for a while.

After that day, Isaac stopped talking about it. And then Derek moved back to the Hale house, now fully restored. After moving back in with his alpha, Isaac seemed better with his jealousy, even though he looked at Stiles strangely sometimes. Scott didn't keep dwelling on it.

After graduation, Stiles told his father that he was moving to the pack house, just like most of them. And that day, Scott smiled at his best friend, thinking that finally Derek and Stiles were going to come out to them, even though they all knew about it.

They were all gathered around the property. Scott helped his human friend carry his things inside. He stopped in the living room, rested the big suitcase on the floor, and turned to his best friend with a blinding smile. "Where to?"

Stiles cocked his head slightly at him as if confused with his reaction. "To my bedroom, of course. The one in the basement," the human finished with the biggest smile.

Scott frowned. "The one with all those creepy things and the soundproof walls?"

"Yep," Stiles said, patting his shoulder.

Still confused, Scott said, "But, I thought you were going to move in with De-"

Though he was cut off by the other alpha himself. "Scott, just help him move and get out of the way, you're blocking the rest of the pack and me. They are moving in too, you know."

And as Derek bypassed him, Scott could smell the dismay coming from the other alpha. It made him jerk from Stiles to Derek. Well, the alpha's back anyway, because he was already going up the stairs with Lydia's luggage. Isaac's words coming into mind

Stiles wasn't giving off anything other than pure mirth as he waited for Scott and his stuff to go downstairs. 

Scott shook his head and followed his friend. "Stiles, I never said anything because I thought that maybe you," he started to say as they walked together into the large room at the bottom of the house, "well, afraid is not the word, but maybe that you were apprehensive about telling your father that you were gay and-"

Stiles stopped him right there with a hand up and a roll of his eyes. "First of all, I'm not gay. I like women just as much as I like guys." The human shrugged, then added, "Second, there's nothing to say. I'm a single man, and I am going to have my own room in the house just like every other single person in the pack."

Scott just stood there, blinking at Stiles, even more confused than before. "But, I can smell it on you, on him. I know you guys are together."

His best friend smiled at him, unbothered. "Yes, we have sex. Frequently."

"For more than a year!" Scott suddenly said exasperatedly, then frowned, rage spiking up. "Derek doesn't want it to be official, does he? That's why he cut me off just now. I'm gonna kill him."

Stiles kept _smiling_. Well, smirking was a better word for it, as of now actually. "No, Scotty. Derek wants anything I want. And before you say anything else, I don't go talking about your creepy threesome with Allison and Lydia, so leave my relationship with Derek alone, 'kay?" his best friend finished with a pat on his shoulder.

The True Alpha didn't know what to say about all of that. On one hand, his friend was right; they didn't talk about Scott's relationship with the girls, even though there was nothing creepy about it. On the other, there it was again, Isaac's voice in his head, pestering him, trying to tell him something, he was sure. 

He watched his friend unpack as they talked, and slowly but surely, he stopped thinking about it. _ Isaac was just jealous; Stiles wasn't like that_. He told himself as he shrugged his instinct off in favor of more bonding time with his best friend, and later on, with the whole pack. 

The months passed, and Scott didn't think about any of it again. Until one day, in a pack meeting, he arrived early due to his class ending before the others, and he heard Derek and Isaac arguing. He was outside of the mansion yet, still not out of the tree line, and he was sure that Derek couldn't hear him, with how nervous the other alpha sounded. He stopped where he was to shamefully hear more.

"Derek, this went too far this time! He used wolfsbane on you to stop the healing, what the fuck!" Isaac yelled.

"I let him!" Derek screamed back. 

Scott jerked his face up just as Isaac laughed bitterly. And he _knew_, Derek wasn't so sincere.

"Bullshit! And you know that! He messed with your mind! You have to stop this." 

"You don't understand," Derek's voice is all but a whisper. "I… I love him."

There's a pause, then Isaac sighed heavily. "Fuck, Derek. I know that. Jesus Christ." Another sigh. "He's sick, Derek. You have to see it. Please, tell me you see it?" The beta pleaded.

Another beat of silence. Scott's heart was hammering inside his chest. They couldn't possibly be talking about Stiles, right?

"It's… It's healing now, okay? I'm fine, Isaac. Please just... Let's forget about this? The pack will be here any minute."

Scott didn't wait to hear the rest of the conversation; instead, he turned and ran away.

\- 

When Stiles got home that day, he saw that Derek was in sub-drop, which was something that had been happening quite often since he moved in. Granted, they were having more sex than usual due to them living in the same house, and Stiles didn't give the wolf much aftercare, if at all. Like everything else that Stiles did wrong, he knew that not giving Derek the proper care after a scene was very wrong. But he couldn't regret it, literally. And it wasn't like Derek _ever_ complained. Though today was a pack bonding day, and Derek was clearly in deep sub-drop. The alpha was curled up on the couch looking like absolute shit, so he smiled at Derek and made the alpha rest his head on his thighs, and he gave the alpha a little bit of comfort, a little bit of love, in front of everybody for the first time ever. It made him happy for a while. He let himself be what they both needed.

Stiles didn't indulge himself, and by extension, Derek very often. He was used to holding back since he was a kid, and his mother first found out about him being a Dark Spark, as opposed to a Light Spark like she was. Stiles was too young to understand what that meant back then. He didn't understand why his mother cried when she found him in the backyard with a dead squirrel in his hands. He was having fun, and she kept telling him that he couldn't have fun like that; it was wrong. 

Growing up, he developed the ability to know when and with whom he could be himself. Stiles mostly couldn't show anyone what he wanted to do, how he wanted to live, or what he thought about some people. He discovered that even though he was a sociopath, and he predominantly didn't feel human emotions—and when he did was different than most people—he could love. He had loved his mother very much, he loved his father, and he had loved Lydia as well. And now, he loved Derek too. But this love that he felt, it didn't temper down his other desires. It only made it stronger. He rejoiced in making Derek submit to him, to hurt the wolf in a way that other people had not, to make Derek remember him every hour of his day. And he was so possessive of the werewolf, that if Stiles could, he'd keep his lover tied down on the bed the whole freaking day, just waiting for him to get home and have his way with him. And Derek would let him, he was sure.

There was nothing that the alpha wolf wouldn't do for Stiles' love. He knew that because he had been pushing the werewolf's limit since they started this thing they have. Sometimes Derek would beg and cry, but he had never, _ever _made Stiles stop. The alpha would just take everything so beautifully. And _okay_, the Dark Spark knew that part of it was his manipulations of Derek's loneliness and low self-esteem, but _again_, he _couldn't feel _any regret about it.

He did give Derek what he asked for though, so it was only fair that the wolf would let Stiles do to him whatever he wanted. Derek wanted someone to love him, and Stiles gave him that. He loved Derek as deeply as someone like him could, and the alpha didn't even love him back. Stiles didn't even hold a grudge about it. The only thing he absolutely wouldn't let happen was a relationship without knowing the other person loved him back. He can be a heartless sociopath most of the time, but he did love Derek, okay? It was acceptable for him not to want to be in a serious relationship with someone that was just using him for his love to feel fulfilled for some reason. He didn't pretend to understand the werewolf; the arrangement was satisfactory for both of them, the Dark Spark supposed. He got what he needed and wanted physically from Derek, and the wolf got the love he so desperately desired. It was a win-win.

Too bad Isaac didn't agree with him and kept harassing them about it from time to time. The first time it happened was more than a year ago when they first started with the blood play. Stiles, as a Dark Spark, _ needed _ to drink blood. He could, though, drink animal blood and did do it before asking for Derek's blood. The problem with that was that, when he tasted his lover's blood, he began to need it more and more often. And thus, the blood play would get more intense. So Isaac heard the alpha werewolf grunting in pain and smelled the blood inside Derek's room the next day. It was a nightmare, and Stiles didn't want to have to deal with the beta, so he got rid of him. 

Everything had been great since then. Sometimes Isaac confronted him, but honestly, Stiles couldn't care less about the beta's opinion. He usually just dismissed it with a bored face. But Isaac could get to Derek when the alpha was in sub-drop, Stiles had noticed it. Derek would get more needy and sensitive—physically and mentally. Those days were the days Stiles let them indulge in a fantasy, that was never going to happen. 

Which led him to where he was now, with Derek's sleeping head on his thighs and his fingers carding the wolf's scalp. It felt good, and for a moment there, Stiles wanted the werewolf to love him back, so they could do that more frequently. 

The Dark Spark sighed. He could have the alpha plainly on his bed, and that would be enough. It always was.

-

Later, after getting a text from both his girlfriends asking where the fuck was he, the True Alpha arrived at the pack house. 

He walked in slowly, his mind going a mile a minute. Deep down, he knew that what he heard was bad and that it was about his best friend. But he couldn't accept it; he needed to be wrong. They needed to be wrong. Maybe Isaac was misunderstanding the whole thing.

He entered the living room and saw that everyone was already there, and they were watching a movie. 

Scott lowered himself between his girls on the mattress on the floor and scanned the room to find Stiles, to look at him. Stiles was sitting the couch dragging his fingers across Derek's scalp, and the other alpha was sleeping curled up on his side with his head on Stiles' thighs. He blinked at the scene. That had never happened before; they usually sit apart, and even when they didn't, Stiles had never touched Derek in front of the pack before. He blinked again, then found Isaac at his alpha's feet possessively clutching Derek's knees. He frowned.

Yeah, Isaac was just jealous, Scott decided. There was no way Stiles was an abuser.

He settled back comfortably with his girlfriends and let himself forget about the overheard conversation between the other alpha and his beta.

Quickly he found himself nodding off. He was tired.

-

Derek stirred awake by a sure hand on his shoulder and a whisper close to his ear. "Wake up, baby. I wanna play."

He stilled in place, opening his eyes. "I'm not all healed yet," Derek said, searching the room to make sure everyone was sleeping. It was stupid though because Stiles wouldn't be asking to play if someone was able to hear it. 

The human hummed thoughtfully. "I won't use wolfsbane again, I promise." It's all Stiles said before gripping his arm firmly and pulling him up.

Derek heard a heartbeat spiking up at Stiles' words, but he couldn't distinguish who was from, though it was probably Isaac. He looked around to be sure, but everybody seemed to be still sleeping, and Stiles was tugging at his arm. Derek knew Stiles lacked patience when he wanted to play, so he let it go and followed the human.

Sometimes Derek would forget why they did this. They weren't boyfriends. They weren't lovers. He didn't know what they were to each other, exactly. Well, he knew they had an arrangement.

** -flashback- **

_ Derek climbed into Stiles' room after a particularly nasty fight with another supernatural creature. He was drained and feeling unworthy after two of his betas deserted him. And he just needed some comfort from the boy he was in love with. _

_ He ungracefully dropped onto the floor of Stiles' bedroom, dirty and bloody. _

_ The human immediately got up from the desk chair and bent down in front of him. "Are you okay? What happened?" _

_ "Wendigo," was all he said before he cupped Stiles' cheek and dove in for a kiss. _

_ When they parted, Stiles asked, panting into his mouth, "What do you want from me, Derek? What do you need?" _

_ On a whim, he answered the sixteen-year-old boy, "I want you, I want your love. I want you to love me." _

_ He was mortified as soon as the words spilled out of him. But the boy only smiled at him and said, "That is the easiest thing anyone ever asked of me. I already love you, Derek, have loved you for a while." _

_ Derek stared wide-eyed at Stiles. He wanted to say it back, but his tongue didn't work. _

_ The boy shook his head fondly. "You know what I want, baby? I want you, tied down, naked in my bed, completely at my mercy. What do you say? I give you my love, and you give me submission." _

** -end flashback- **

And it worked most of the time. Even though he knew Stiles didn't want them to be in a relationship for real, even though he would loathe for hours sometimes. It worked because Stiles loved him, or at least pretended he did; Derek wasn't sure, and the alpha gave the human whatever he wanted. 

He knew that sometimes Stiles went too far, but at the end, when they were curled up together, and Stiles whispered _I-love-yous_, and _you're mine _into Derek's ear, it made it all worth it. Even if they were few and far between.

"Strip," Stiles said as he closed the door behind them.

Derek stripped quickly and waited for Stiles to look his fill; the human always liked to drink him in.

"Gorgeous," Stiles said, and Derek could already smell the arousal as Stiles looked him up and down. "Turn around. Let me see it." The alpha turned his back to Stiles. The human hummed appreciatively at the marks on his butt cheeks. Derek had looked in the mirror, and despite himself, he found them pretty, so he guessed Stiles was very pleased with his work. "It's almost fading. Maybe you can take a little bit of wolfsbane after all."

The alpha jerked back toward the human, eyes wide. "But you promised. Please, Stiles, I can't."

Stiles shushed him. "I say what you can and can't do. Now, lay on your stomach while I get what I want from our toy chest."

Derek laid on his stomach on the massive bed in the middle of the room. His body was shaking with anticipation as he remembered last night. It was the first time they had used wolfsbane, and Derek cried like a baby when Stiles flogged him until he was bleeding. Then cried again after Stiles pounded into him while jerking him off, but at that, he cried from shame. He came so hard, and he was loathing for hours after it. Especially because it had been one of those nights where Stiles would get up and tell him to go to his bedroom, instead of cuddling with him.

As Stiles' knee dipped the bed, Derek started to shake even more while begging, "Please, Stiles, I can't take wolfsbane again." He pleaded into the soft fabric on the sheets, tears gathering in his eyes. He didn't look up. "Please, please."

The human chuckled, and the alpha felt knees straddling his thighs, hands caressing his bruised ass. "Why Der, don't you want me to make love to you? To appreciate you? Love you?" He nods against the sheets. "Say it," Stiles said right after a hand smacked one of his buttcheeks.

He cried out. "Yes, I want you to love me. I always want that."

Stiles hummed in admiration. "Good boy. Okay then, I won't use the wolfsbane." Derek sagged in relief. "IF, you let me cut your back again. What do you say?"

Derek froze beneath Stiles. They hadn't done that many times these past two years, because even for a werewolf using a knife to slash his flesh open was not safe. And he would bleed a lot; Stiles didn't just cut him in one place, and the gashes were deep so that he wouldn't heal too fast. 

The human huffed in annoyance. "Come on, big bad alpha, it's just a little blood, and you'll heal fast enough."

"The wolfsbane isn't fully out of my system yet," he said apprehensively. He knew he was pushing his luck; Stiles would snap at any minute. 

Another slap at his cheek came, with more force this time. He cursed. "You're whiny today. Isaac bothered you again about us, didn't he?"

When Derek didn't answer, Stiles got up and left the bed with an annoyed huff. He lifted his face from the bedding to look at Stiles, who was standing beautifully naked in front of the bed, arms akimbo. 

"If you don't want this anymore, just tell me, Derek. I don't want to love you if you don't want us anymore," Stiles said, looking at him.

Derek shook his head. "You know I want you, us. You know I'd give anything for your love."

Something inside Stiles shifted, but Derek couldn't read him; he never could. He never knew what Stiles was feeling apart from arousal. It was as if Stiles knew how to keep his emotions in check, his heartbeat too. 

"Look at what you did," the human said, motioning to his flaccid dick. "Now I have to get hard again, Derek. Wolfsbane or knife play? You have until I get back from the bathroom, or I'll choose myself."

The alpha didn't need to think; he knew that he couldn't take wolfsbane again, or else he could actually get hurt, or even worse, die. So when Stiles got back in a couple of minutes, he said quickly, "Knife play."

Stiles smiled broadly, grabbed the knife from the chest, and climbed onto the bed, straddling his thighs again. The human lowered himself onto Derek's back. "This is one of my very favorites, baby. Can you feel it?" the human said as he rubbed his hardening erection against the werewolf's ass.

Derek nodded as he closed his eyes tightly, clutching at the sheets for dear life. His treacherous cock filling up as Stiles rubbed his own on his ass. The scent of Stiles' arousal was so intoxicating, Derek absolutely loved it. 

Stiles kissed his shoulders softly, still rubbing himself on his ass. "God, you're so good for me, Der. Can't you see it?"

"It's all I want," Derek answered, his heart tight in his chest. It was those moments that made him keep going. The moments when Stiles showed him a bit of tender love. Derek lived for it. He drank it fully. "I want to be good for you, Stiles, always." _Forever _and _I love you_, went unsaid. Derek could never say those words. He tried a few times, but his tongue seemed to lock inside his mouth, as that if he told Stiles that he loved him, everything would fall apart. And Stiles never asked. Stiles always asked if he wanted to hear Derek saying something, so maybe the alpha was better off not saying anything to his human that wasn't welcomed. 

"Fuck, I need to taste you," Stiles said, stopping what he was doing in favor of sitting on Derek's ass. The alpha tensed again; he knew what was about to come. He kept it quiet though. "Look at this beautiful ripped back. God, you're so hot, Derek," the human said, rubbing one of his hands on the alpha's back. Derek knew that the other hand carried the knife. He felt the cold metal touching the top of his back, near the shoulder, and squeezed his eyes shut in anticipation. The first cut was quick and shallow; he could feel it. _ Maybe Stiles was softer today. _

As he felt the hot blood on his skin, Stiles moaned, rubbing his rock hard cock on Derek. "Beautiful, fuck. Look at that, it's healing slowly. Isn't this my lucky day, baby?" It's a rhetorical question, Derek knew that Stiles liked to talk a lot, even when he was inside the alpha, so he always kept his mouth shut unless the human asked him something. "Well, I'm going to enjoy this fully," Stiles said as he got up from Derek, patting the side of the alpha's ass. "Get up. All fours, baby."

Derek did as told and waited, looking back at the human, who was drunk with lust. His mouth parted as he looked at Derek with so much hunger in his eyes. Derek's cock pulsed with desire. He loved the way Stiles was so into him like that, and he wanted to feel Stiles close to him so badly.

Stiles stroked his ass tenderly, then caught Derek looking at him and smirked. "You want me, don't you, baby?" He nodded at the human, sighing softly. "I will get you ready for my dick but not as loose as yesterday. I want you to feel my cock stretching you open good." A dry finger rubbed at his rim at the words. He closed his eyes again and waited for the pain, but it never came. Stiles just rubbed at it a couple of times, pushing the pad of his finger slightly, then grabbed the lube from the nightstand, quickly getting back.

Two strong hands grabbed at his tender cheeks, pulling them apart. Stiles hummed. "Here it's healed fully, it seems." Stiles let his ass go. Then cold liquid was squeezed onto his crack, sliding down to his perineum. The human rubbed one finger against his rim again, smearing the lube all over the muscle. Then the same finger slid in without hesitation, earning a gasp out of the alpha. The human moaned as he played with Derek's hole, finger sliding in and out forcefully.

Derek's dick took an interest in it, even though it was hurting a bit, but what did it for him was Stiles' debauched voice. "Fuck, Derek, your asshole is so tight every time I slide in. I love it." As soon as the finger was sliding easily, Stiles jumped from one finger to three. This time slowly, letting Derek adjust to the stretch. The alpha was moaning loudly at this point, cock hard between his legs, all the hurt from the day before and the one to come forgotten. He rocked back a little on Stiles' fingers, knowing that Stiles liked to be in charge, and he couldn't move too much, but unable to hold it back fully. "Look at that, taking my fingers so well, baby. I wish I'd have a camera right now, to show you how good you open up for me." 

Stiles shifted behind him without removing his fingers from inside him, moving in and out slowly. It was becoming torture already. He needed more, needed to feel his human inside him, loving him. "Stiles," Derek moaned like a plea.

The human shushed him, moving again, and at the same time, speeding up the fingers in his ass. "Feels good, huh? I wanna feel good too, baby." With that Stiles rested the knife on his back again, Derek stopped his movements. "Relax, Der," Stiles said as he massaged his prostate purposefully, rubbing it in circles as the knife sliced his skin slowly. Derek felt his flesh ripping open gradually, hot blood pouring out of the torn skin and dripping from his right side onto the bedding. And it hurt so much more this time. The alpha choked on the pain, claws ripping the sheets as he whimpered. "Fuck, that's so hot, baby."

Derek shook his head slightly, tears gathering again, though the pain was mixed up with the pleasure of Stiles' fingers massaging the sweet spot inside of him. Stiles let the knife go and brushed two fingers on what the alpha knew was where the blood was running down his skin. As the pain subsided a little with his delayed healing, Derek felt good again, letting himself thrust his ass back, to seek his pleasure from his human's fingers. 

He heard Stiles licking the blood from his own fingers and moaning at it, before going for another swipe of it, ingesting his blood bit by bit. "You taste so good, fuck. I'm so hard, baby. I'm gonna fuck you now."

Derek didn't know why his blood would turn Stiles on so much. It's not like he was a vampire. But it made Stiles go crazy, and the human seemed to want to drink him dry. The alpha liked to think that it meant the human wanted to feel closer to him, just as Derek did. And if to Stiles all of this; his blood, owning him in bed, Derek was okay with it. 

Stiles pumped his fingers in a little more, slicking sounds indicating that the human was using a lot of lube on his cock. The fingers left his hole, and in a heartbeat, the head of Stiles' thick cock rested on it. "Deep breath, baby," the human said, patting his buttcheek, his other hand gripping Derek's hip hard. The alpha took a breath, trying to relax his hole, but not much because he knew Stiles liked to make it hurt when he said that. 

Before he could let the breath go, Stiles pushed in, clutching his hip for leverage. Derek gasped as he felt the hard length of the human's dick breach him open to the hilt in one go. His ass wasn't stretched nearly enough, just like Stiles wanted it, and his human didn't even let him adjust to the stretch, thrusting hard in and out as soon as he was fully sheathed. Hands were clasping his hips bruisingly, nails digging into his skin. 

Derek's dick deflated considerably at Stiles' ministrations, a feeling of wistful creeping in as he kept himself up for the human. He always felt this way when Stiles was particularly rough with him after kicking him out the day before. Derek knew what that meant; he had read about sub-drop after the first couple of times this happened. And almost two years later, he's fully aware of the signs of his drop although he thought that this time wasn't going to be like this. Because when Stiles arrived home and saw that Derek was curled up in the corner of the couch, probably looking miserable, the human smiled at him and sat by his side, dragging the alpha to lay on his thighs as he stroked his head affectionately. Derek had rejoiced in it, the slumber quickly coming as his tired body sagged into it. He hadn't slept after he went back to his room the night before, bruised and bloodied.

"Fuck, I'm gonna die of pleasure. You're gonna kill me with your ass." Stiles laughed, delighted, pounding hard into him. "Your hole feels so good squeezing me, baby. Fuck." 

Not even Stiles' voice was doing it for him this time. His back was hurting from the not-fully healed cuts, his ass was still sore from the last play, and his hole was too sensitive. But he knew it was only a matter of time for Stiles to _make _him enjoy it, _make _him come. Because even though the human was jubilant to see him in pain, to cause him to feel pain, Stiles also enjoyed punching the orgasm out of him and always succeeded. 

Stiles stopped the hard thrust and begun a slow pace, letting his thick cock slide in and out so slowly, both hands caressing Derek's sore ass, before pulling his cheeks apart, obviously watching his dick moving in and out of his hole. It must be an amazing sight, if the loud moans escaping from Stiles' mouth were anything to indicate it. 

To Derek's shame, his cock started to fill up again as the pain changed to a dull ache, and Stiles angled his cock to brush his prostate. At every glide of his human's cock inside him, his cock filled up more, and he began to groan his own pleasure. In no time, his dick was at full hardness, and he was desperate to come. But the alpha knew it wasn't going to be that easy. He only had two cuts on his back, and last time Stiles did that when they finished; Derek's back was covered in quickly healing gashes. He could hope, though; after all, Stiles wasn't so rough today, only with the first thrusts. 

The alpha moaned the human's name, rocking back onto that cock ever so slightly, not to make Stiles mad at him. "You like that, don't you, baby?" the human asked with a chuckle. "You know what I like, Der? I like to savor your blood while pounding into your tight little hole."

And that was it; Derek tensed again, stopping his movements. "Please." He tried shaking his head, knowing it would be in vain.

The human shushed him and grabbed the knife from the side of the bed. "Don't you want to please me?" Derek nodded. Stiles' warm body enveloped him, making him feel safe for a moment. Soft kisses were placed on his shoulders, a gentle bite on his neck. He was again drinking the tenderness in, enjoying it while it lasted. Stiles rested his forehead on Derek's neck, panting as their bodies moved in synchrony, in and out at a slow pace. "Fuck, I need you. I need to taste you, baby."

Stiles kept the slow pace as he lifted the knife and laid the cool object on Derek's skin, letting him feel it. Derek held his breath, waiting for the pain that was sure to come. The human latched his mouth onto the alpha's neck, sucking hard. The slice came even slower this time. Derek could feel every centimeter of flesh being ripped open, and the blood running freely. He started to cry silently, tears running down his cheeks, and he felt more of the blade cutting into his back in what would be a large—but not so deep—gash for sure. Stiles was a sadist, but he knew what he could and couldn't do, and with the wolfsbane still lingering in his system, the wound could not be as deep as the human usually made.

The alpha knew that he had been through worse than that, but when another alpha impaled you onto the ground, it was different than the love of your life making you feel pain in a moment that should be pleasurable. It hurt more than simply his flesh being torn apart, but at the same time, he felt good knowing that he could satisfy his human like that. After all, he was a powerful alpha werewolf. He would bleed and feel pain, but his body could take it, and he would heal faster than humans did, leaving no scars to tell the story. 

For his utter relief, Stiles threw the knife far away. The human used his now free hand to push the top half of Derek's body down. "Look at you. You're so beautiful painted red like that," Stiles said while sliding into him without stopping. The hand that shoved him moved to where the blood was still pouring from his wound, the whole palm smearing the blood before letting go. The human licked his hand clean, moaning at the taste as he sped up his thrusts. 

Stiles lowered himself onto Derek's body again, using his blood-slicked hand to jerk the alpha's mostly—but not fully—flaccid cock into hardness. In no time, he was moaning as he felt his orgasm climbing at the feel of Stiles' cock deep inside him, hitting his prostate often, and the human's large hand jerking him off exactly as he liked it. 

"Come on, baby, come for me. You know I love to hear you scream with pleasure," Stiles said into his ear, speeding up his ministrations, making Derek go crazy with lust, rocking back and forth. Their sweat covered flesh slid together in sync as if they were made for each other. Curses and moans were filling the room from both of them. 

"Come on, come on, baby. I'm gonna come," Stiles said, hitting Derek's sweet spot mercilessly, the human's voice tipping him over the edge with a scream, cum spilling all over the bedding. "Fuck, that's it." Stiles groaned, thrusting hard a couple more times before he stilled inside the werewolf, panting over Derek's neck. The wolf felt the human smile against his skin. 

They were still in the same position when Derek's breathing got back to normal, and the pain on his back made the appearance again. And at that moment, the shame crept in a little, but he tried to tamp it down as he prayed that today Stiles would let him stay, that his human would hold him close and whisper sweetly to him until he fell asleep. His eyes started to sting as he waited, blinking to prevent the tears from falling. Stiles couldn't see it. He didn't let Stiles see it, ever. It was one thing to cry from pain; that was okay, but to cry from emotions? Never. 

"I love you, Der," Stiles said, nuzzling his neck, then started to kiss and lick his healing cuts. He sighed, heart tight with longing. "I love you," Stiles repeated. "You want water?"

"No, Just… Stay here for a bit," Derek said, daring to hope. The human slipped out of him, pulling him down on the bed, and he let the breath he didn't know he was holding go. 

"You're so perfect for me, baby. Look at what you give me," the human said, pushing Derek onto his stomach and climbing on his back. Licking all the blood from his skin and then licking the wounds carefully. "I love you so much."

God, Derek could die now, and he'd be happy. A smile blossomed from him; he felt so warm inside. He almost could say it back. He did though, inside his head. In his mind he was chanting _ I love you too, I love you so much, Stiles. _

The alpha let himself sleep, melting from inside out, feeling all the love Stiles was giving him. The last thing Derek remembered was his human's warm hands stroking his body all over and Stiles' voice in a chorus of _I-love-yous _in his ear.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, there's more knife play and blood-drinking here but this time Derek actually enjoys from beginning to end, if that was not okay for you in the first chapter.
> 
> Okay guys, so this is it, the end. :D I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Thank you for the support, and special thank you to [sisforsterek](/users/sisforsterek/) for helping me through all of it! s2s2

Scott didn't sleep again after he overheard Derek talking about the wolfsbane. And the way Stiles had answered Derek, all authority-like.  _ My God _ , what was his best friend  _ doing _ with the other Alpha? Derek—a strong Alpha, from an old family of powerful,  _ born _ werewolves—was  _ scared _ . He didn't like to admit it, but Derek was stronger than him, a True Alpha. 

Isaac's voice echoed in his mind.  _ "He's sick, Derek, you have to see it. Please, tell me you see it?" _

Scott shook his head, denial at the tip of his tongue. But how could he? Deny the evidence right before him. Evidence of his  _ best friend _ harming—mentally and physically—another member of his pack.  _ For years _ . If Isaac was right, it had begun before Scott realized. Before Isaac was kicked out of Derek’s loft.  _ My God _ . Had Stiles really made Derek do that? And how awful of an Alpha was he to tell Isaac he was lying? Jesus Christ, it was all his fault.

He got up early in the morning, not wanting to lay there any longer, and went about his day. Job nor college waits for no man. The True Alpha's day was not very productive; he was spacing out a lot. Deaton even called him out on it. But he couldn't stop thinking about Stiles and Derek, and wondering what the hell he would do to put a stop to it.

Clearly, talking with Derek had made no difference for Isaac, and Scott is pretty sure that it won't be any different with himself. It wasn't like they were friends or anything. Sure, they could co-Alpha the pack, and when there was a threat, they could work together to take it down. But, they didn't get along too well on a daily basis. 

The True Alpha arrived at the pack house and went straight to Stiles' bedroom. When he tried the handle, the door was locked. So then he walked through the house looking for Stiles, and while he found other members of the pack who lived there, there was no sign of his best friend yet.

He stopped at the kitchen door, where Isaac, Lydia, and Liam were eating and conversing. "Is Derek home?"

"Not yet," Isaac answered, without looking up from his food.

Lydia frowned at him. He cursed internally. "Well hello, honey. What do you want with Derek that is so urgent that you didn't even give your girlfriend a kiss?"

Scott tried to make his dumbest face, but he knew she wouldn't buy it. "Nothing urgent. I just need to ask him something." He walked up to her and kissed her lips briefly. Then he averted his eyes from her and set them on Isaac. "Can we talk?"

He could feel Lydia's watchful gaze on his back as he walked away with Isaac in tow. He'd hear from her again, for sure.

"Where are we going?" the beta asked when he saw that Scott wasn't stopping to talk, but instead was walking out of the mansion.

"Away from werewolf ears," he said, walking faster towards the trees.

When Scott finally stopped at the edge of the trees, Isaac immediately asked, "What is it? What happened?"

The True Alpha sighed as he scratched his forehead. "I heard… I heard Stiles and Derek talking last night, about the wolfsbane." He didn't dare look at the beta's eyes.

Isaac laughed bitterly. "Now you believe it, huh? I tried to tell you. I tried to tell you several times."

"I'm sorry, okay! It's Stiles!" Scott said as if it explained everything. It did to him; the human was his best friend, his brother. They’ve known each other forever. 

The beta just shrugged. "You're blind; everyone is. But I grew up with a sociopath in my house, so I know one when I see one."

"Whoa! Hold on!" the Alpha said with a placating gesture. "Now you're just exaggerating. Stiles is  _ not _ a sociopath."

Isaac scoffed. "Think what you want, Scott. I stopped trying to make you believe me a long time ago. I only care about my Alpha. He needs to get away from Stiles for his own sake," the beta said as he walked away from the True Alpha.

"What that's supposed to mean? Am I not your Alpha too?"

The beta stopped, laughing again. "You think, what, just because you're a True Alpha, and Derek lets you decide things with him, that I have to suddenly see you as  _ my _ Alpha too?" The blonde shook his head. "I went to you for help, and what did you do? I'll tell you. You dismissed me. Sure, you gave me a place to stay, but you have never cared for me as Derek does. So no, Scott, you're not my Alpha. Derek is."

Scott watched the beta's back, feeling bad. He could not argue with the blonde; he had dismissed it, and he hadn't trusted the beta about Stiles. But it was  _ Stiles _ . He couldn't be blamed for it.

His head snapped sideways at the sound of the Jeep approaching, and his eyes narrowed at the human. They would have to talk about this; there was just no way Scott would let this keep happening. 

He marched back into the house to wait for his best friend.

-

Stiles' day had started incredibly well. He had woken up with Derek in his arms, smiling up at him, and he knew Derek was happy and wasn't going to experience sub-drop again today. Which would lead to another amazing night of hot sex later. The Dark Spark couldn't wait for it, so that he could have the Alpha at his mercy again.

He parked his car in front of the manor and climbed out of it with a smile on his face. When he opened the door to the house, he had to stop in his tracks, because Isaac was standing right behind it, with his arms crossed and a smirk on his face.

Stiles frowned at the beta. "What?" the Dark Spark asked annoyedly. He knew that Isaac didn't like him very much, and that face meant something.

"Scott heard you last night and finally believes me," Isaac said, smiling smugly, then walked up the stairs.

Stiles froze in fear. He shook his hands nervously and closed the door behind himself.  _ Shit. _ It was one thing with Isaac knowing, because Derek could control the beta. But if Scott knew about his sociopathic tendencies, then all could end badly. Especially his relationship with Derek. The True Alpha could convince the other Alpha that their arrangement was not good for Derek; Stiles couldn't have that.

Scott appeared before he could get it together; fear was probably emanating from him, and he didn't know what his best friend would interpret from his behavior and scent.

"Is he right? Are you hurting Derek? Are you manipulating him?" the True Alpha asked in a low tone, obviously not wanting the other wolves to hear. Stiles appreciated that. 

"No," he answered quickly, too quickly, panic getting the best of him. Scott closed his eyes, clearly disappointed with the lie.  _ Damnit. _ He was usually so good at lying and controlling his emotions. "Please, Scott. Can we talk about this in my room? Please, it's not what you think! Let me explain, please?"

When his friend opened his eyes, they were Alpha red, but he nodded.

Stiles walked down the stairs to his room, with his heart pounding in his chest. He needed to think,  _ fast _ . _ And calm the fuck down! _ There was no way he'd lose Derek. The Dark Spark was sure that if he didn't convince Scott, he not only was going to be exposed, but also would lose his Alpha. And  _ that _ , that could not happen.

So he took deep breaths, all the way down to his bedroom, trying to find the right words and the right mindset to convince his best friend that Isaac didn't know anything about Derek’s and his relationship. 

When he opened his door and stepped into the room, he was almost calm again as he closed the door behind them, but then Scott snarled and pinned him to the wall. "What the fuck, Scott!"

"I can smell his blood; what the fuck did you do?" his friend growled in his face.

_Fucking shit! _Stiles was sure he’d cleaned all the sheets and changed all the bedding before going to class. Had he dreamt that? Or could Scott smell blood in the _fucking_ _air_? "Scotty, I can explain. Just let me go," he said, trying for innocent and calm, but his heart was all over the place.

The True Alpha tightened his fists on Stiles' shirt, snarling, eyes burning red into his best friend's face. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

Stiles closed his eyes and tilted his head back against the wall with a thump. He started to shake his head, desperate to think of something, to make Scott believe him. "I love him," the Dark Spark said after a few minutes of silence. He didn't open his eyes. Stiles needed Scott's sympathy; otherwise, this wasn't going to work. So he took a shaky breath and repeated the words, with more sentiment this time, as if he was on the edge of crying, "I love him, Scott."

The Dark Spark felt his best friend's hands loosening up slowly, Scott heard the truth behind his words for sure.  _ Well, it was the truth. _

"Then… Then why? Why are you hurting him?" the True Alpha asked, so much confusion showing in his voice. 

Scott's resolve was crumbling, he knew. But he needed more, so he prepared himself for the show of his life. When he opened his eyes again, there were tears in them. "It's consensual. I'm into BDSM, you know, sadomasochism. I can't help what I like, okay? But I… I love him, Scott. I'd never really hurt him as Isaac implies." So far, nothing he said was  _ really _ a lie.

His best friend let him go but didn’t step back. "I can smell his blood. I heard him yesterday. Stiles, he was afraid. What are you thinking? This isn't consensual; Isaac is right! He lets you do this because he loves you too much." Scott pointed a finger in his face. "This has to stop. If you really love him, you can find another way to satisfy your—" The True Alpha looked at him with an expression that was very close to disgust. "— _ needs. _ I will not let you hurt him anymore."

Stiles scoffed, because really, Derek didn't love him back. "You know Scotty, I think you're misunderstanding this. Derek doesn't love  _ me _ ; he lets me do it because he knows  _ I _ love him, and in exchange for the love he so desperately needs, for some reason—" He shrugged. "—he satisfies  _ my needs _ as you said." Now that Stiles was calm again—if a little pissed—he could control his emotions and heartbeat easily. "But I have never made him do anything that he wasn't okay with. I can  _ assure you _ that everything we have ever done was very consensual." Scott was about to say something, but Stiles didn't let him. Instead, he spoke again a little bit louder to stop his friend from talking. "Do not let Isaac fool you with his jealousy and his fear of losing his Alpha; Derek always enjoys it, and you know what Scott, he comes so hard when I'm finished with him."

Scott looked horrified as Stiles smirked, feeling triumphant. "Okay, I…" the True Alpha stuttered, finally stepping back. "I believe you, but Stiles, you are wrong about one thing."

He tilted his head to the side. "What is that?"

His best friend inhaled tiredly. "Maybe you can't see it, maybe he's too afraid to tell you, but I can smell it, and I can see it, every time Derek is close to you. And the way he looks at you as if you are his whole world." Scott shook his head in disappointment. "That man loves you, and I'm sure that Isaac is partially right; you are hurting him in some way, and you should stop."

Scott shook his head in clear disapproval, sighing tiredly. "You either stop, or I'll make you." But his best friend's voice had no heat behind it, only sadness and disappointment.

Like everything else that Stiles observed and knew about human emotions, he knew that he should care that Scott was disappointed with him. But the Dark Spark felt nothing as he watched the True Alpha walk out the door with his head hanging a little bit. What he did care about, though, was discovering if Scott was right about Derek's feelings towards him.

-

In the following days after his conversation with Scott, Stiles kept his distance from Derek. He needed to think about what his best friend said, and what he would do about it. If Derek really did love him, then they should talk about their arrangement. It might no longer apply. Scott might even be right about Stiles hurting Derek emotionally, not that it was on purpose, and not that the Dark Spark regretted anything about those two years together. But… he did love the Alpha, and even though he was a sociopath, and the relationship would not be the same as a normal couple, Stiles wanted it. He would be able to show everyone that the wolf was his and only his. And it sent a thrill through his whole body, the power he had between four walls could be more than that; Derek could be undeniably  _ his _ . 

Stiles was used to leaving his bedroom door unlocked when he was  _ in it _ , so that Derek could seek him out if he wanted to. Most of the time, he was the one calling for the Alpha, but sometimes Derek would come to him in his bedroom, just like he did when Stiles lived with his father. The Dark Spark supposed that it was when the wolf needed to feel loved. Now he didn't know anymore; maybe Derek missed him?

He decided to lock his door at all times now, just to see what Derek would do. Would the Alpha ask why? Would he tell Stiles that he missed him? He didn't think so; Scott was probably wrong.

Nearly a week had passed, and even though Derek had knocked on his door twice, when Stiles didn't answer, the Alpha just walked away. Never once had Derek asked why Stiles locked his door, never once had he tried to talk about it.

Stiles was about to go to Scott and tell him that he was wrong, that Derek didn't feel that way, when the werewolf started to change visibly. Even though that might not really mean that the Alpha was missing him or loved him, it meant something. Because Derek was grumpier than usual, and sometimes Stiles could see how sad he was. But the wolf still didn't  _ say  _ or  _ do _ anything, and he was intrigued as to why. 

But even if he missed Derek and all that came with having the wolf on his bed, Stiles didn't know if he'd believe the Alpha if he just plain asked. Derek usually said what he wanted him to say. And the Dark Spark didn't want to be lied to about this. He could have sex with other people if he wanted to. So he waited.

Two weeks later, when Stiles arrived home from class, Derek was pacing in front of his bedroom door, muttering something that he could not hear with his unenhanced hearing. He must be distressed, because he didn't even acknowledge the Dark Spark's approach.

"Derek? What are you doing here?" he asked amusedly as the Alpha stiffened and turned to look at him.

"I need to talk to you," Derek said. When Stiles didn't move, the Alpha stepped away from the door, averting his eyes to the ground.

"Come on in then," he answered the wolf, walking into his bedroom and leaving the door open for Derek to follow.

He heard the door close behind him and walked the remaining steps to his bed, sitting at the edge of it and turning to look at Derek. Stiles cocked his head, watching with interest as the wolf stood by the door. Neither of them said anything for a few minutes.

"Are you going to stand there, or are you going to talk, Derek?" he said, with a hint of amusement in his voice.

The Alpha still didn't look at him, even as he walked up to Stiles and kneeled in front of him. Eyes downcast and hands behind his back in perfect submission. Stiles had to hold his breath to not moan at it; it was a beautiful sight.

"What did I do wrong? How can I fix it?" The werewolf said weakly. 

"God, look at you. A powerful Alpha werewolf kneeling at my feet in submission; you're gorgeous, Derek Hale," he said in awe, then touched the wolf's left cheek with his right hand and lifted his lover's face a little so their eyes could meet. "Why are you here? What do you want, Der?" The werewolf's eyes danced uncertainly, and Stiles could see the apprehensiveness. "I need you to use your words, baby." 

"I missed you. You didn't let me in. You didn't ask for me," Derek said. "I thought that maybe you were mad, that I did something wrong and didn't notice. Did I do something wrong, Stiles?" 

"No, baby, you didn't do anything wrong," the Dark Spark said, thumb brushing Derek's cheek affectionately. The werewolf closed his eyes, leaning into his hand. "But this has to end.”

Derek opened his eyes wide and looked at Stiles with shock and sadness for a few seconds before he spoke with so much sentiment, "Why?" 

Stiles thought that the werewolf might even cry. He smiled fondly, his hand still on the wolf's face. "Because Der, It's not fair to you or me. We both deserve someone who would love us just as much as we love them."

Derek averted his eyes to the opposite side of the room, letting Stiles' hand fall from his face. "I'm sorry. I thought, I thought you loved me too," the Alpha said, getting up as if to leave.

Despite himself, Stiles' heart jumped a little at the words, just a little. And sometimes, the Dark Spark would think that maybe, when it came to Derek, he could feel more than just love. It would flee fast enough, and he would be back to not feeling anything too deep, too meaningful. 

He did want the wolf, though; it didn't matter if his feelings were not deep enough or meaningful enough like a normal human being. Stiles grabbed the Alpha's wrist before the wolf could walk further away and held him in place. He looked up and waited for Derek to turn back to him, then said, "Did you mean it? Do you love me?"

Derek nodded, and as the wolf’s gaze met his own, his face was screaming heartbreak, but Stiles didn't feel any sympathy, especially because he was happy to hear it. He decided, all or nothing. Since Scott was going to keep a close eye on them from here on out for sure, he needed Derek in the know, and Stiles would do anything for them to get past this and get back to where they were. Well, better even, because now he knew that Derek loved him back.

"Have you ever heard of a Dark Spark, Derek?" The Alpha shook his head in answer. "It's something akin to an evil witch, but evil witches have a say in it; they choose to be evil. A dark Spark doesn't have much of a choice in the matter; they are born like that."

The Alpha frowned in confusion, changing his stance to Alpha mode. "Do we have a problem with a Dark Spark?"

Stiles smiled, not letting his Alpha's wrist go, even tightened his grip a little more. "They are heartless sociopaths; sometimes, they get out of control and hurt a lot of people. But mostly they are just sociopaths living amongst normal people. Do you know what a sociopath is?"

Derek rolled his eyes. "Of course. What is it? Do we need to call the pack?"

"Nope, we don't. Because I don't want anyone else to know about me, just you," he said and waited for the wolf to understand.

Derek frowned, and then his eyes widened. "That doesn't make sense. You aren't evil. I know you."

Stiles smiled and finally let the wolf go. "I am a sociopath, Derek. I know how to fake human emotions as if they were my own. Besides, it's what I have been taught since birth. To fake it so humans won't know, to hold back so I won't end up at the end of a hunter's bullet. Maybe that made me not as dark as I should be, I guess. Unlike most of my kind, I can love. I don't know why that is; maybe it was because of my mother." The Dark Spark shrugged. "I was young when she died. It weakened me because I loved her. It's what I'm assuming anyway. I don't know much about it. It doesn't usually happen with my kind."

"You?" the Alpha said, confusion all over his face. "But you don't, I don't think... Are you sure?"

"I was born a Dark Spark, Der. So yes, I'm sure, even though I feel love, or my version of it anyway."

"Because you loved your mother?" Derek asked, face blank.

Stiles shrugged again. "It's my theory. Though she was a light spark, so maybe I was always meant to be something in between. Who knows. There's no record of it. Light sparks don't have dark spark children."

The Alpha didn't say anything, and Stiles thought that maybe the whole conversation wasn't going the way he wanted, so he decided to keep talking, keep telling Derek what he did feel. Whatever it was, the good and the bad. 

"I'm a sociopath and a sadist, but I can understand right and wrong, and I know that what I was doing was wrong, but—" The human shrugged. "—I thought that you were using me to feel loved, so to me, my actions were justifiable." Derek looked at him then and nodded. "I still don't regret it or feel any remorse, though. And I know that a normal person would apologize, and I could, but you're the only person I know I can be myself with. I won't lie to you; I'm not sorry. I enjoyed every minute of it. I enjoyed seeing you in pain. I enjoyed you desperate for me, for my touch. It wasn't perfect, and I wanted you to love me back. I wanted you to stay and sleep with me. I wanted to call you mine in front of the pack. But other than that, yeah, I enjoyed it."

Derek studied him for a moment, but Stiles could see that the Alpha wanted to understand what was going on. He could even see a little bit of hope behind the wolf's eyes, so he waited. "You really love me the way you use to say you did?"

Stiles nodded, smiling. "Being very clear. I wouldn't die for you, but I'd kill for you in a heartbeat; there's little I wouldn't do for you." He cocked his head, observing the wolf carefully. "Sure, I always wanted to see you in pain, but only by my hands. And yes, I wanted to slice your flesh open and drink your blood, but I also wanted to make you happy, I wanted to hold you in my arms every day, and I wanted everybody to know that I love you and that you love me. I wanted them to know you're mine and nobody else's. I wanted to give you the world, Derek." Stiles shrugged. "But I only wanted those things if you loved me back, and that's why I never gave you all of the—" He gestured with his hands trying to convey what he meant. "—you know, _the good part—_" He finger-quoted it. "—as a normal person would say, because I thought you didn't love me. You never said it."

"I assumed it was obvious," Derek said, scratching his head. 

Stiles rolled his eyes dramatically. "I'm not a werewolf, Derek. I can't smell things like you do, so you need to  _ tell me _ how you feel; you need to  _ show _ me."

"I thought I  _ was _ showing you." The Alpha crossed his arms defensively. 

"Yeah, okay. How?" The Dark Spark answered, motioning with his hands for Derek to continue.

Derek blinked at him. "What?" 

“What did you do to show me? How did you show me?"

Derek stared for a while. "I… Why would I want your love?" 

"Because you're lonely and have low self-esteem. Next?" Stiles said, probably looking as bored as he felt. 

The wolf's eyes bulged at that. "I.. Yes but… That's not why I said I wanted your love."

The Dark Spark interrupted him, "Again, not a werewolf Der, what else?“

Derek looked away as he said the next thing. "What about everything I've let you do to me?“

"What about it? We had an agreement; I give you my love, and you let me tie you up and do what I want with you," Stiles said, dismissively. "I kept my end of the bargain, and I thought you were doing the same."

The Alpha rubbed his face in frustration. "Fuck. Okay… You… Might be right. But I, you're so smart, how could you not know?“

"Oh, so now this is my fault because I didn't see the ways you showed me you love me?" He laughed sarcastically.

"No, that's not what I meant, Stiles, Jesus," The wolf said, rubbing his face in frustration.

"What did you mean then? What else should I have seen? The way you averted your eyes from me when we were with the pack? Or the way you wouldn't even talk to me and kept telling me to shut up in front of everybody? Or the way you would say you didn't want my help in the fights? Or maybe the way you never talked to me about anything other than when I'm helping you with the plans to help save the day? How was any of that you showing me you love me?" the Dark Spark said exasperatedly. 

The werewolf stared at him, with his mouth open. Then he seemed to get out of his thoughts and looked away, ashamed, if Stiles was reading him right. "I'm sorry. I didn't think, I thought… Fuck…" Derek said, hiding his face in his hands.

"Everything I know about you was because I researched it, or Peter told me, or Cora told me. You don't talk to me, Der. We have sex, that's it." Stiles sighed. "Look I'm not blaming you; I'm just telling you why I didn't know, baby."

At the endearment, Derek looked back at him, a smile creeping on his face. "Okay." The Alpha said as he walked closer to Stiles and kneeled in front of him again, looking up at his eyes. "I'm sorry."

The human flipped him off. "It's fine. I have no remorse, but I also don't feel any grudge." Stiles laughed amusedly. "Otherwise, I wouldn't still be friends with Scott. Guy is an ass." The Dark Spark laughed again. 

At that, Derek laughed too, tilting his head to the side and raising both eyebrows as if agreeing with him. Stiles cupped his lover's face and leaned in slowly. "I love you, baby."

"I love you so much, Stiles," Derek said, exhaling through his nose before meeting him halfway to kiss. 

#  Months later

Derek was on his knees on the edge of their bed— _ yes, _ he could say  _ their _ bed now since the Alpha moved in with Stiles—as Stiles stood behind him, one hand gripping his hip, and the other firmly holding the knife against Derek's upper back, just letting him feel the cool object in anticipation. 

"I can't get enough of you, baby. All of you, your body, your love, your delicious taste," Stiles said, licking his back, just shy from touching the blade, and that made the Alpha shudder with want.

After they talked about everything that happened, as well as all of the things both of them wanted from each other, Derek stopped feeling bad about their knife play. He knew now that Stiles  _ needed _ blood, and that  _ his _ blood was both like an aphrodisiac and a boost of strength for his boyfriend. And he knew for sure that Stiles loved him, and even if it hurt, the Dark Spark would bathe him in love and after-care. So after a few weeks, Derek started to  _ want it _ , to play along with Stiles, to plan their play beforehand with Stiles. He felt like now he was a part of it, and not just something for Stiles to get his rocks off with. 

"I'm ready," Derek said just because he could. 

Stiles hummed against his naked back before the wolf felt the knife opening his skin in a deep cut. He gasped and clenched his hands above his thighs, controlling his healing for his boyfriend to be able to see his wound healing at a slow speed. His boyfriend's hand traveled from his hip to his hard dick, jerking him at a leisurely pace, just to keep his arousal—from the gentle and thorough fingering before—up as he sliced Derek's back again.

"Fuck, baby. You're perfect," the Dark Spark panted against his back, then licked him clean without stopping the ministrations on his dick. "God, you taste so good. You make me crazy." 

His boyfriend kept lapping at his slowly healing wounds, and Derek was desperate to feel all of Stiles' body touching him, inside and out. "Stiles, please," he croaked out with a strangled moan, shaking with want, keeping himself from thrusting up into Stiles' hand; he wasn't allowed to do that. 

"One more, baby, can you take it for me?" the Dark Spark asked in between trailing wet kisses up from the middle of his back to his neck and biting it gently. Derek whined but nodded, eager to please his boyfriend.

Stiles didn't lose any time, quickly slashed his back again, and dropped the knife on the ground. Derek was so turned on with everything, and his boyfriend's hand on his dick, that he wasn't even feeling the pain that much. Instead, he could feel every inch of his skin that Stiles was kissing and licking with so much desire and lust. It made his own bubble up, and he let another moan—louder this time—slip from his mouth. 

"StilesStilesStiles," he chanted as if his boyfriend could read his  _ mind _ , and sometimes Derek thought that Stiles did. Like at that moment, when the Dark Spark let go of his dick to push Derek down on top of his own knees and thighs, ass on display on the edge of the bed. Stiles held his cheeks apart and thrust inside in one smooth movement. Derek cried out with pleasure, feeling the hot flesh slide into his already stretched hole to the hilt. 

Stiles gripped his hips and hammered inside, groaning, forehead resting on Derek's spine. "Fuck baby, you're so hot inside. Your hole is so perfect. Shit. I'm not going to last," his boyfriend said with an amazed laugh. The Alpha didn't know why Stiles always seemed to be surprised that he would come so fast when he drank the wolf's blood. Derek already knew that this would happen; it was  _ one _ of the reasons why he started to enjoy the knife play.

Derek gripped the sheets, his claws ripping them apart as he moaned loudly, the feeling of his lover deep inside him, and his own cock brushing between his thighs and belly, was bringing him closer and closer to orgasm. "Come in me. Please," he panted out between shallow breaths.

Stiles slammed into him once, twice, fingernails digging into his flesh as he thrust hard one last time. Derek screamed his boyfriend's name as his orgasm was sucked out of him on Stiles last thrust. The Dark Spark half panted/half laughed, his breath hot on Derek's skin, contentment radiating from both of them.

"I love you, baby," Stiles said, nuzzling the wolf's neck.

Derek smiled with his face squashed against the bedding. "I love you too," he said, turning his face to look at his lover.

Thinking back, even though Derek knew that he suffered for a long time with Stiles, he wouldn't change that for anything. Because now he had everything he ever wanted and loved it. 

Derek was so happy that even Isaac was starting to warm up to Stiles. He could die happy now. 


End file.
